Fresh Alternatives to Fetlife for All Your Kinky Pleasures


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Fetlife has been around since 2008 and boasts its presence as more of a community than a dating site. Developed by BitLove, Inc., the site was created by someone who saw a need for more options in the fetish and kink community when it came to online socializing, networking, and connecting. Unlike traditional dating sites, there is an algorithm in use here, and you aren’t going to be prompted to “like” or “swipe” on profiles. In fact, on this site, you actually have to seek out the profiles of other users through the search feature.

Fetlife is unique because it offers such a diverse range of fetishes, kinks, and potential relationship options for the people who join. The site is open to all genders and sexualities and allows users to identify themselves in their profile based on their kinky interests. You can choose from titles like “fetishist”, “sadist”, “sensualist”, “babygirl”, “daddy”, and others. There are dozens of different choices, including an option for unsure or undecided, and even one for those who are “exploring” or “evolving”. This helps other users quickly identify whether you would have a connection.

Of course, there is one big fatal flaw of Fetlife.com for kinksters today—it hasn’t really been updated much since its inception and the site can tend to be stale at times. Plus, you can only see so many pictures, and can’t watch videos or access advanced features without paying for a membership. While some larger cities still see a decent amount of regular activity, those who live in more remote areas might find it difficult to actually connect with other members. Even some of the most-involved BDSM folks don’t know about Fetlife because it’s just older and not as popular in many circles.

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What Else is Out There?

Thanks to technology, there are now more kinky dating sites and apps available today than ever before. They all have their own pros and cons, and each one will be different depending on your exact needs. If you’re looking for a fresh place to find kinky dating and more, check out the sites below:

- Alt.com: The original alternative dating site offers both free and paid options for BDSM and kinky dating and hookups.

- Fetish.com: A diverse site featuring a full range of kinks and fetishes to explore, with free and premium memberships available.

- Fetster.com: A leading fetish site for those looking to actually hook up with local kinky folks for a little fun. You can join free, but premium membership is required for full access.

- TheCage.co: A great forum for the BDSM community to connect for discussions, support, and even to find hookups and partners. Free and Premium membership options are available.

Of course, there are literally dozens of dating sites, apps, and social networks dedicated to the kinky community, including those for specific fetishes or niches if you want them. Take the time to explore your options, and if you feel like Fetlife isn’t working out for you, try any of the sites on this list for a better chance at getting what you want from online fetish dating.